(Lack of) Progress on becoming a better Christian

I have been having trouble with becoming a better Christian. I have had trouble changing my behavior, and I know enough to know what is going on and why. I know that I need to change to progress in whatever ministry God has for me inside and outside of music. It doesn’t seem to matter when I don’t keep myself in check.

I’m trying not to think that I have failed, but have stumbled upon many setbacks. Not working, really.

I might be doing things wrong. My goals might be too big or scattered among many qualities. I want to be more generous. I want to lower my levels of aggression. I want to stop being excessively selfish and self-centered. These goals have proven to be too big.I need to make the goals more manageable: smaller in scale. I need to improve on my thoughts on whether is it even possible to become a better Christian. I need to do small improvements in my day to day life and just let them add up over time.

This is easy to write on a blog post. Not easy to carry it out and maintain the healthy perspective. In practice, it seems a lot different than it was taught in Health Education. I guess that this realization can be made of any field. I need to figure this out if I want to succeed. No one can do it for me, not even God. God is doing more than enough and for God to do more of his part I have to do my part.

I thank God for this process. I know that I will learn how to do things and how not to do things in this Christian walk. I just have to stick this out and do my work. I have lived most of my Christian life thinking that I’m doing it wrong. That I am failing. Maybe that’s what Satan wants me to believe so that I wouldn’t get to where I need to go. I just have had a hard time recognizing it and stopping this idea to turn into an adopted attitude. I have to learn from my mistakes and become better than my former self. I must evolve and be a better Christian. It will just take time. I must have faith in God and His ways. I will get to where God needs me to go.

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