As an INTJ, in social interactions there is a phenomenon that happens that I call delayed reaction. In Puerto Rico this might seem like “loading” (which means to not being able to process something in the appropriate time frame). It might even be perceived as being aloof, unresponsive, emotionless, submissive, etc. Yet what goes on for an INTJ is not what it seems. The fact is that it is much easier to take outside stimuli and process them in our heads than to react at the moment without comprehending the situation fully. Therefore, a delayed reaction happens.
For the most part, the manifestation of a delayed reaction happens in our heads and no one will really know the content of our reactions. At times, though, our morality causes us to act. This, in my experience, tends to complicate things further. Yet we INTJs keep manifesting our delayed reaction thinking that it will be different. That’s a sucky reaction!
Our lack of a reaction is not an indicator of a lack of response. Sometimes it is, especially if it is about a topic that doesn’t interest us. Other times the lack of reaction is an indicator of the fact that our minds are processing the data that we are acquiring. Because we can’t quickly go through this process, then we seem like we have no ideas, emotions, thoughts, or opinions. We have ideas, emotions, thoughts, and opinions. We just won’t release them to the world until we are certain that they truly represent the nature of what our minds actually think.
This is one of the reasons that email and text messages, but especially email, are very important to us INTJs. It allows us to be able to communicate the products of our delayed reaction without interruptions (because that will give us new data to analyze and we can’t have that) and it will allow us the canvas to redact our sometimes elaborate and totally awesome* ideas.
The INTJ delayed reaction is no one’s fault. No one should be blamed for this. In fact, this might be a common introvert occurrence. The appropriate reaction is to allow us the time to analyze the data that we have and get back to you (through email or text, preferably). Please understand that our minds work differently, not poorly. If you are patient and understanding, you will be the (for the most part) happy recipient of long and numbered mainly emailed responses that can give you more accurate information than a more on the spot method of communication.